It’s the 1st of October and you youngins, freshlings, freshman, freshers are a-preppin’ to enter, to cross, to breech The Bridge, The Cam, The Bubble. For many of you, first year anonymity will be a powerful gift. A gift which you should use wisely-arrive with an idea of who or what you want to be and be it.
This is even more important for all of you MMLers out there and others considering a year abroad. You only have 2 years to establish yourself as the Super Don that you are so you should endeavour to create a legacy which lasts a lifetime…or 9 months at the very least…long enough to be sure that you won’t find yourself relegated to the position of lonely tag-a-long 4th year who is eager to add to their sparse social memories, who is haunted by social-events missed, who is pitied by the new generations, who is bitter inside and a joke outside – This is a genuine fear of mine, please don’t let this be me.
I wish someone had warned me of this risk sooner so I couldave started work on my social empire sooner. Join dat society and play dat sport, ball so hard and make mutha f***kas wanna fine you yo’
There are mixed sports, college sports, uni sports and, as contencious as they may be for all the Sex, Drugs and Rock’N’Roll, there are Drinking Societies…in reality there isn’t much more to the activities of these societies than drinking followed by naming and shaming…but they’re a sure-fire way to establish yourself in some of the strongest circles. Ima tell it to you straight: The years you spend in higher education are almost as geared towards networking as they are to learning.
Almost but not quite, so stay in school and study your books kids.
This brings me onto the more serious matter of academic achievement. We all have our goals, even the most seemingly unmotivated of us. Whether it’s to open one eye at least a little bit before 1PM or to score a I class mark on every essay, we’re all working towards something. It’s important that you don’t lose sight of this or what you ultimately want out of your course. Even if it’s to find the perfect economist husband. These are the things which will keep you grounded during your time at university.
That one drunken night with that one beautiful
(you think)historian might just ruin it all so bear this in mind when you’re reaching for your 6th and a half tequila shot or the engineers penny hidden in your pocket which you intend to use to royally destroy a friend…they have goals too.
More often than not, if your bud’s eyes are playing tag with each other, sparing is caring…and necessary.
In conclusion, study hard, play hard and GOOD LUCK CHICKENS.
Cirque 1993 xoxoxxo